Total pages in book: 84
Estimated words: 81718 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 409(@200wpm)___ 327(@250wpm)___ 272(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 81718 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 409(@200wpm)___ 327(@250wpm)___ 272(@300wpm)
She smiles, but it’s a sad smile that doesn’t reach her eyes. “When I found out it was twins, I was stunned but didn’t have time to dwell. Two days later, my dad was diagnosed with stage four pancreatic cancer.”
My chest is tight. My heart is cracked wide open for this woman. My woman. I’m trying to tamp down my anger for her benefit. Now is not the time to be raging mad. I know that. I’m trying, but I’m so fucking angry that this happened to her. She’s been dealt a tough hand, one I never could have imagined. I knew she had a past, something she was keeping close to her chest, but I never imagined that it was this.
“I know this changes things. I know it’s a lot, but I have one favor to ask of you.”
“Anything,” I force the reply past my lips.
“Don’t—Don’t hold it against them. They love you, Forrest.”
“What the fuck?”
“Thank you for listening. Please… can you keep this between us?”
“Briar.” She doesn’t look at me. “Baby, look at me.”
“I can’t,” she cries. “It’s too painful. Just go.”
Go? How in the fuck am I supposed to leave after that? Does she really expect me to walk away?
Yeah, no. That’s not how this is going to work.
CHAPTER
SIXTEEN
Briar
My heart is shredded. There isn’t a single piece that’s still intact. When I saw Forrest snuggled up with the girls in their fort in the middle of my living room, I knew my time was up. I had to tell him. The girls are attached. I’m attached. I couldn’t let us keep falling for this man, knowing he’s missing a huge piece of who we are as a family. My girls and me, and even my sister.
“Go?” Forrest grits out.
I can feel his heavy gaze, but I can’t make eye contact with him. It’s too much. Losing him is too much. I knew better, but it’s not all my fault. He slipped into our lives, and into our hearts like a thief in the night, and here we are.
Our hearts are invested.
“Please don’t make this harder than it already is,” I plead through my tears.
I hear him rustling and my heart stutters in my chest. This is it. This is the moment when he walks away. In a way, this is just as soul-crushing as that night all those years ago. He’s not a nameless, faceless memory.
He’s our Forrest.
Our Forty.
He’s in our hearts, and the pain is already unbearable.
I startle when he slides his arms beneath me, lifting me from the lounger. He takes my place with me nestled on his lap. There’s a lump in my throat that makes it almost impossible to swallow back the sob that’s threatening to break free.
“You had your turn, baby. Now it’s mine. I need you to listen.”
I nod because words fail me. I don’t know what he’s about to say, but being in his arms, it feels right, as if this is where I’ve always belonged. This very well could be the last time I feel his strong arms wrapped around me. So, while this is torture, I’m soaking up every second of time with him.
“I’m not going anywhere. Do you hear me, Briar? I’m right here. You’re safe in my arms, and that’s where you belong. That’s where I need you.” His breathing is labored, and his voice is stern.
“I wish you could see it,” he continues. “I wish you could see you how I see you.” He pauses and presses his lips to the top of my head. “Every day, Briar, you are the first thing I think about when I wake up. Not just you, but the girls too. I can’t tell you how many times during the day I want to call you to tell you something. From a song on the radio to something I think the girls would love.”
He stops again, and I notice his breathing is calmer. He seems to be settling down, and oddly enough, it’s calming me too. His words race through my mind, and I don’t have time to really decipher them when he starts talking again.
“At night, my house is quiet and lonely. I find myself wishing you and the girls were there with me.”
I lift my head to look at him. He wipes at my tears with his thumbs. “Really?” I ask. I’m having a hard time processing all the emotions of the evening.
“Really. Baby, I hate what you went through. I hate what was stolen from you. It hurts my heart that you think I’d walk away because of it.”
“I’m broken, Forrest. I’ve had sex once in my life, and I don’t remember it. That one night that I can’t remember gave me two of the greatest gifts in this world. I have a lot of emotional baggage.”