Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 87284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 436(@200wpm)___ 349(@250wpm)___ 291(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 87284 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 436(@200wpm)___ 349(@250wpm)___ 291(@300wpm)
His eyes welled up too. “I needed to hear that.”
“Don’t cry. You know what that does to me,” I replied quickly. I could already feel my mushiness returning.
He let out a breathy chuckle and sniffled. “I’ve missed you so much.”
He was gonna fucking break me. I threw my arms around his neck and screwed my eyes shut. “I’ve missed you too. We are so fucked.”
His shoulders trembled with a silent laugh. “We really are.”
I sniffled and grinned against his neck. He smelled of ocean salt, Hugo Boss, and what I assumed was sunscreen. “I want us to be that primary for each other, Walker.”
He held me impossibly tighter and kissed my shoulder. “Me too, love. That’ll be our goal.”
I inched back and ran my fingers through his wavy hair. He’d always kept it short and neat, but he couldn’t hide the waves. They were gonna be sun-kissed soon too.
We just watched each other for a beat, and though I was too cautious to explode with hope, I felt at peace for the first time in ages.
“Where do we start?” I murmured. “I don’t wanna fight yet.”
“Me either.” He sniffled once more, composed again, and cleared his throat. “In the spirit of starting fresh, I’d like to take you out for coffee or a meal as soon as possible.”
I liked that. That kinda filled me with hope. A second chance. A do-over. Going through all the little elements of a new beginning, getting to know each other, asking about work and hobbies and stuff. We needed that too. A lot had happened over the years, and we’d stopped paying attention to those changes long before we’d actually broken up.
“How about tomorrow?” I suggested. “The others are going iguana hunting—”
“That sounds fun.”
“Does it, though?” I grimaced playfully. “Doesn’t it sound much better to have lunch with me on Marco Island?”
He smiled a gorgeous smile. “It does. Lunch tomorrow, it is.”
Perfect. The others could have a blast shooting at lizards. I had better plans now, thank you very much.
“We should probably discuss kink and playtime too.”
Right. I nodded. Yeah, we should. Oof, okay, I could admit I got nervous again. So much had changed. So fucking much. I loved openness now, but Walker… As he’d already pointed out, we were each other’s exception to the rules, and we needed our own set.
“We’ll make it simple.” He brushed something away from my forehead. Probably sand. “The last thing we need now are a bunch of boundaries. I want to observe your play the way it’s been since I left. It’s the only way I’ll discover my new limits.”
I swallowed and nodded again, understanding the implication. We would be open. Completely open.
Shit.
This could very well blow up in our faces.
Fuck. I didn’t like the way my stomach revolted, and I had to be honest. “I…might prefer some…boundaries.”
His expression softened. “I’m listenin’.”
I exhaled in an attempt to ease the tight feeling in the pit of my stomach. “I understand this is hypocritical of me, but I would like to know if you’re going to play with another sub.”
“Why would that be hypocritical?”
Ugh. Did I have to say it? I made a face. “You know…since I was with Dean.”
To my annoyance, Walker chuckled at me.
“We’ll have time to clear up that mess too,” he told me. “But in your defense, we weren’t together. I won’t hold that against you in kink. I promise.”
Oh, thank God. I was not gonna get emotional again, but holy fuck, that felt good. I unclenched and took a deep breath.
“Thank you.” Then I felt the need to add, “I’m okay with group play, obviously. I’m not expecting you to discuss anything with me when we’re in a place like this. I just don’t wanna be blindsided. No matter how, uh, active I have been since we broke up, I’m still mad possessive of you, and this is so new for us.”
Why was he so damn amused? This was painful to me!
“You don’t know how reassuring it is to see you flustered, pet,” he chuckled. “No blindsiding—that’s a good rule for both of us. We’ll discuss playtime with others beforehand.”
“Agreed.” I nodded. More satisfied, but far from satisfied enough.
The problem was, I had no room to talk here. I couldn’t put a leash on Walker when I didn’t want one for myself. That, if anything, would be hypocritical.
Safe to say, I had plenty of insecurities to deal with. And if I were completely honest with myself, I had to start considering the possibility that I wouldn’t want my future relationship with Walker—if we played our cards right—to be completely open. What Tate and Kingsley were doing, opting to play with just a few people they trusted wholeheartedly, might be what I wanted too. I didn’t know yet.
“You’ll play with me too, right?” I asked hesitantly.