Total pages in book: 198
Estimated words: 186242 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 931(@200wpm)___ 745(@250wpm)___ 621(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 186242 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 931(@200wpm)___ 745(@250wpm)___ 621(@300wpm)
“Oh,” I said.
Rhodes’s sigh was soft. “I’m a little scared of not doing all the things I want to do, I guess.”
“Like what?” I asked him, my forehead still to his neck. I could feel the steady beat of his heart, and it soothed me.
“Well, seeing Am grow up.”
I nodded.
His palm settled on top of my thigh. “I hadn’t thought about it in a long time, and I don’t think I have too much time left, but I think I’d like to have another kid.” His chest rose and fell against me. “Not I think. I’m sure.”
Something inside of me stilled. “You would?”
He nodded, the bristles of facial hair tickling my skin. “Yeah. I told you how much I regret all the things I missed with Am. I like kids. I just wasn’t sure I ever would be able to have one in the first place, but back then I didn’t think I’d be back in Colorado, not in the Navy, not . . .”
“Not what?” I asked him, holding my breath.
The hand on my thigh slid up to my hip, lingering there. “Not . . . here.”
I didn’t know what he meant. Or maybe I was just too tired to think about it too much because I nodded like I understood when I didn’t, feeling a small pang in my chest at the idea of him wanting another child, considering how that child would need to be conceived . . . How he would need a woman in his life to have one because Amos’s mom couldn’t have another. I asked, “What would you want? If you could choose. Another boy or a girl?”
The arms around me tightened just a little. “I’d be grateful for either.” His breath drifted over my cheek, and I realized then just how much I liked his voice. The steady roughness of it. It was such a treat to my ears. “But I only have brothers, and I only have nephews, so maybe a girl would be kind of fun. Break the cycle.”
“Girls are fun,” I agreed with a shaky exhale. “And I’m sure you still have time. If you wanted. I’ve heard of men having kids in their fifties and sixties.”
I felt his “mm-hmm” through his chest. “You?” he asked.
“I don’t care either. I’d love them anyway.” I sniffled. “I might have to settle for a puppy though at the rate I’m going.”
His laugh was a soft puff, his words damn near a whisper. “No. I don’t think you’ll have to do that.”
I lifted my head and looked at his handsome face. This close, the color of his eyes was even more incredible. His lashes were thick, his bone structure perfectly pronounced. Even the lines at his eyes and alongside his mouth were shallow but added so much to his features, I’d bet he was even more handsome now than he’d been in his twenties. Even though my cheeks felt tight from the tears, I managed to smile at him a little. “At this point, I think I’d be happy to have someone to grow old with so I’m not alone. It might have to be Yuki.”
Rhodes’s face softened as his gaze, which I felt to the tips of my toes, roamed mine and his hand slipped back down my leg to rest on my thigh. He gave it a squeeze. “I don’t think you have to worry about that either, Buddy.” His gaze settled on mine, and the next thing I knew, he hugged me again.
He hugged me for a long time.
And after a while, he eventually pulled back and said, “I got news today. I have to leave for a few weeks.”
“Is everything okay?”
Rhodes’s nod was grave. “Another warden in the Colorado Springs district was in an accident, and he won’t be able to get back to work for a while, so they’re sending me there.” The hand on my thigh flexed. “They said two weeks, but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was longer. I’ve got a few days to get things sorted. I need to call Johnny and see about Amos.”
“Anything I can do to help, let me know,” I threw in.
His mouth twisted, and I had to fight the urge to hug him. “You sure?”
“Yes.”
His mouth twisted a little more. “I’ll talk to Am and get back to you.”
I nodded and thought about something. “Is he still grounded?”
“Technically. I still tell him ‘no’ to a few things, so he doesn’t think everything has been forgiven and forgotten, but I’m letting him off the hook a little. He barely complained about his punishment, so I don’t see a point being too hard on him.”
I smiled.
But the twist of his mouth dropped off, and Rhodes said, seriously, “You’ll be fine here.”
“I know.”
“I might let Am stay, but I might not. I haven’t thought about it enough, but I’ll tell you as soon as I do.”