Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 85274 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 85274 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 426(@200wpm)___ 341(@250wpm)___ 284(@300wpm)
“Take this off,” he commands, sitting up on his haunches and helping me lift the tiny tank top I was wearing to bed. Because I’m braless, my breasts are immediately on display, and Lincoln wastes no time taking one in his hand and wrapping his lips around my nipple. He licks and sucks on the hardened peak, and I moan in pleasure. I never knew how good being intimate with someone could be. The men who raped me hurt me, and the boys I tried to be with afterward obviously didn’t know their way around a woman’s body, nor did they understand how to pleasure one. Until Lincoln, I felt broken, but little by little, he’s piecing me back together.
Lincoln’s tongue trailing down my torso takes me out of my thoughts as I focus on the way he’s kissing and licking his way down my body. When he removes my cotton shorts and panties, he spreads my thighs slightly and lifts them to my chest. I’m not sure what he’s doing, but since I trust him, I don’t question it until his tongue lands on my puckered hole and flashbacks from that day crash into me like the strongest, unexpected wave, knocking me back and causing me to choke on salt water.
Force.
Pain.
Tearing.
Blood.
Screaming.
Begging.
Crying.
“Stop, please!” I choke out, the memories hitting me so deep, they’ve taken my breath away. Blackness prickles at my vision. White noise clogs my hearing. And then like a light switch, everything turns off. And I feel like I can finally breathe again.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
ELLIE
“There she is,” Lincoln says when I open my eyes and take in my surroundings, trying to remember what the hell happened. He’s sitting against the headboard of my bed, and I’m cradled across his lap. I glance down and see that I’m dressed, and then it all comes back to me. Embarrassed by what transpired, I try to scramble off Lincoln, but he’s not having it.
“Stop,” he says gently, holding me tighter against him and palming the side of my face. “Talk to me. What happened?”
I hesitate to answer him, in fear of the flashbacks hitting me again, but when he pinches my chin and tips my face up to look at him, my body instantly relaxes. This is Lincoln. I can trust him. It was stupid to expect that because I haven’t freaked out on him yet that it would never happen.
I keep my eyes on Lincoln as I speak, needing to remind myself that I’m here with him and safe. “When I was raped, they did it...in every hole. But the worst was when they did it from behind, in that hole.”
Lincoln’s eyes darken in understanding. “Not now, but at some point, I need you to tell me what happened.”
“No.” I shake my head. “I can’t do that. Please...”
“It’s the only way I can assure what happened today doesn’t happen again,” he explains, and while what he says makes sense, the thought of verbalizing what they did makes me feel sick to my stomach. It doesn’t matter that it’s been years since it happened. Every time I think about it, it’s as if it just happened.
“Everything we’ve done has been amazing,” I whisper. “I just wasn’t expecting that. But I’ll be okay next time.”
“Kitten...” Lincoln lays me on the bed and wraps himself around me like the most comforting blanket, trapping my legs in his. He slides one arm under my head and the other glides across my waist, resting on my hip. “You said you wanted to be with me because you trust me, right?”
I nod. “I trust you more than anyone else.”
“Then I need you to trust me with what happened. It’s the reason members of the club are required to fill out a form with their limits. Something you should’ve done. Luckily, nothing I did that night triggered you, but it could’ve. I never should’ve touched you without scanning you into the system, so I’d know your limits.”
“If you would’ve done that, we never would’ve been together,” I mutter.
“Probably,” he admits, “but being the owner of Elite means I’m held to a higher standard, and what I did that night was irresponsible, and something could’ve gone seriously wrong.”
“Why didn’t you scan me in?” I ask curiously.
“I was too wrapped up in you. It’s no secret I’ve been with my fair share of women...” When I pout at his admission, Lincoln chuckles. “Not as many as you’re thinking.”
“How many?”
“I don’t keep track, and whatever number I give you won’t make a difference. But the point I was trying to make is that even though I’ve been with other women, something about you felt different. From the moment I saw you at the bar, the chemistry between us was off the charts, and I was so shocked by my reaction to you, all my common sense got shoved out the door.”