Total pages in book: 222
Estimated words: 213974 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1070(@200wpm)___ 856(@250wpm)___ 713(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 213974 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 1070(@200wpm)___ 856(@250wpm)___ 713(@300wpm)
“You know what I’m saying is true. You don’t want to confirm it. I get it. You know that Kolis believing you are Sotoria is the only thing keeping you alive, and the embers of the Primal of Life safe. That’s smart.” Attes crossed the cage. “But there is no point in lying to me, Seraphena. I know Eythos’s plan did not work as he intended.”
I stood rigidly, my thoughts racing. Even knowing what had caused Attes’s scar, wariness still invaded all my senses. I shifted from foot to foot, glancing at the closed doors. I knew I had to make a choice. Trust Attes, or not. If I did and was wrong, I would die, and Kolis would have the embers. But I didn’t… I didn’t think he was here spying on Kolis’s behalf. That just didn’t make sense when he’d apparently covered for me and stopped Kolis when he attempted to take the embers.
I took a deep breath, knowing I wasn’t risking only my life. “Is there a difference between rebirth and being reborn?”
“The phrases are often used interchangeably, along with reincarnation, but a rebirth usually involves the souls of those who have not truly lived,” he said, referencing the babes Ash had spoken of. “Those who are reincarnated may have memories or even dreams of who they once were, and that’s as rare as the act itself, and is usually reserved for viktors.”
“And being reborn is like starting over,” I murmured. “Having no memory of who you once were.” I glanced up at him. “So, having a soul placed alongside another is…?”
“I have no clue,” he admitted with a biting laugh. “It’s not supposed to happen. But it could be the result of what Eythos tried to do—something impossible. Or the Arae intervened.”
I thought back to what Attes had said about the Fates. “But you said the Arae ensured Eythos’s silence, as well as yours, as a way to balance what Eythos did.”
“Yes. But I never said it was the only thing they did,” he countered. “I don’t know why they did this. Then again, one of them put the idea of taking embers from another in Kolis’s head to begin with, and who really knows why anyone would share that knowledge?”
He had a point there. Delfai, the God of Divination Ash and I had spoken to, had said the same.
I shook my head. “What is the point of this? Sotoria’s soul is in me. Does that not make me her for all intents and purposes?”
“A soul is nothing like embers, Seraphena. Two should never be in one.”
A great sense of unease rose. “And what happens if there are?”
“It means that Sotoria’s soul is…”
I watched him look away as he shoved a hand through his hair.
“She’s trapped in me?” I asked.
“Basically.”
I closed my eyes as a shudder rocked me. Trapped. I thought I knew what that felt like, and I did. But I couldn’t imagine what it must be like for Sotoria.
“That bothers you.”
Opening my eyes, I found Attes’s gaze on me. “Of course, it does. I can’t even let myself really think about it without freaking out,” I admitted. “I don’t want that for her.”
“Neither do I.” A muscle ticked in his jaw. “And it also means that when you die, Sotoria’s soul dies with you.”
“Well, I figured that, but wouldn’t that be the case if her soul were simply reborn or whatever, too?”
“If Sotoria’s soul was reborn, you would be her. She would be you. And when you died, your soul would move on. But that is not what happened here. Her soul is in you, so when you leave the mortal coil, she will be trapped in your body until her soul is destroyed, and then she will continue in this…state. Unable to move on. Unable to live or die.” His eyes closed. “She would just be.”
My lips parted in horror. I could practically hear the wailing often heard in the Dark Elms. “She would be like a spirit?”
“Worse. She would become lost.” He came forward again. “Does anyone else know this?”
“No.”
“Not even Nyktos?”
“I…I don’t think so. He’s always made a point of telling me that I am Seraphena, but how would he have any way of knowing?”
“He would if he looked,” Attes said. “He is, after all, a Primal of Death, retaining the abilities lost to Kolis. He can see souls, but I’m not even sure he would understand what he saw if he got the impression of two souls.”
I sucked in a sharp breath. Had Ash looked? I didn’t know. “But Kolis said he held on to my soul, keeping it inside me until he took me to the Triton Isles. Wouldn’t he have felt two?”
“I’m surprised he could even do that. So, it’s doubtful he knew exactly what he held. He could’ve grabbed her soul, which kept you alive. It’s anyone’s guess. Either way, do you understand what all of this means?”